OK at lot of wives/husband come home early from work and find their spouse with another man/woman. My wife has had a weight problem all her life, today I came home early and realized she went through a whole bag of Milano Pumpkin Spice cookies. I don't know why. My wife is my best friend, but with her weight problem (even after gastric bypass surgery years ago) she is still flabby and has many scars from various surgeries. I am not physically attracted to her. Sex is rare and very vanilla. Should I see what the rental car agent has to offer? (see my previous post).
We have two in college so divorce would mean financial hardship for our children. With sacrifice on our part, they will have no student debt when they graduate.
A recent study found that women who carry a little extra weight, live a lot longer than the men who mention it. You are on borrowed time Dude.
yes, of course you should see what the agent who is paid to be friendly has to offer. what kind of woman is your wife, eating cookies? what an awful thing to do. i bet she hadn't even had a bad day or anything, though you probably didn't care to ask.
seriously, is this thread a joke?
A woman with the discrimination to choose Milanos, you hold on to.
This didn't even make me laugh.
Divorce her and don't use children as an excuse.
There's like only 8 cookies in one of those bags. If you're are looking for excuses to justify future actions of being unfaithful, you've already succeeded in breaking your loyalty to her.
Whilst divorce may be out of the question , I still think you should have a talk with your wife before even considering cheating. That way you can explain how you feel and find out how she feels about your relationship . Perhaps then you can both come to some amicable arrangement re possible separation or counselling to keep you together. Cheating IMO is not the way forward.
The fuck? You're describing the woman who bore your children as "fat" and "scarred"? And you're enough of a control freak to not only freak out over each and every calorie she ingests, but to specify and analyse the type of calories? I may not agree with your wife's taste in cookies--sweets aren't my thing--but IMHO, she would do well to toss you out in the rubbish bin with the empty cookie bag.
Want to spend some time wallowing in a Recommended Read? Pick one! Or two! Or seven!
After rereading your OP, one thing really kind of stuck out to me -- that your wife has struggled with weight all her life. This is hardly a surprise to you. Gastric bypass surgery and the lifestyle changes necessary to give it a chance to be effective are difficult. 200 pounds is a tremendous amount of weight to lose. One package of cookies isn't going to reverse all that progress. People succumb once and a while. Guilt isn't helpful.
At some point you found her sexually attractive in spite of her struggles with weight, but now you've lost that attraction. I may be wrong, but it sounds like you're looking for moral support from the members here to cheat on your wife.
Here's the thing -- cheating likely isn't going to help things.
Obviously there is some deep rooted problem here... no one just eats a bag of cookies because they’re hungry. She wasn’t worried about you “catching” her either. It’s a cry for attention/help/something. She is probably so depressed that to her the little tiny joy she gets from eating the cookies is worth the ultimate pain and suffering it will cause her. This is someone so hurt and damaged that any tiny little escape she gets from eating is worth it. This person needs immediate help, maybe even a life coach that is constantly in touch with her to help her through any cravings that can lead to destructive eating. Good luck.
Have you ever considered that she turns to food in place of affection. You married her and have two children, so obviously you had affection for her at one point. Most women need to know there is still something there. My ex constantly ignored me and had multiple affairs instead of talking to me. I became very depressed and like your wife I turned to food for comfort. To me one of our biggest responsibilities as a married couple is to make sure your spouse knows how we feel. Have you tried to spice up your sex life? I'm not judging, but if your not happy, and I understand staying to pay for tuition for your kids, talk to her. Going out and screwing someone else isn't going to fix the problem. If she's your best friend, you won't devastate her like that. Good luck to you both. If you decide on the affair, at least be a man about it and leave.
OP, please be sure to tell your partner that I am making a fresh batch of brownies and she is welcome to stay at my place instead of putting up with your small-mindedness in addition to your other obvious *ahem* shortcomings
First of all, I am a cookie monster so I immediately thought you wrote a thread about me. Not me? Lame!
Seriously lame is your shit-talking though. These kinds of comments make it obvious you're not exactly a catch yourself. So I propose this... there's a new year coming. How about you get with her and make some resolutions? Both of you explore the world, try a few new things, get the fuck out of the house even if it's for therapy. Sounds like stuff you both need.
Good luck.
I understand why your asking for advice here as you probably haven't made up your mind. That being said I think the best course of action is to sit down with your wife and talk things out in regards to your feelings and what you want from your relationship that you aren't currently getting. You have children together so you know pregnancy changes a woman's body. As you said she had surgeries probably in an effort to help lose weight. If you want her to lose more since she is not currently attractive to you bring it up gently, seeing as this is something she's struggled with her whole life and still is, her self confidence in her body is probably pretty low. Maybe you could start working out together, a way to offer her encouragement. If you'll waiting til your kids gradute college before getting a divorce that's not fair on anyone. Sure it benfits your kids financially by paying for thier college but in the long run your hurting your wife and yourself if you continue in your marriage while not wanting to be with wife anymore. If she's truely your best friend try to find a solution rather then going for divorce.
One day you will wake up all alone because she will have realized how she can dump a few hundred more unwanted pounds.
I apologize that was a knee jerk reaction it’s been a year since you asked the question (which I’m sure you have regretted) and I hope your heart has softened a little towards her.
There's a guy out there with a bigger dick that will gladly bring her more cookies.
Good luck getting yourself out of the pickle jar.
