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Dating advice and confusion.

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Lurker
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So I went back into the dating pool and to be honest I have never really dated. A little over a year ago I started dating my ex. He was the only one I had gone out with ever and we hit it off. I broke up with him months ago due to him pulling away from me. Since the 4th of July, I have gone on three dates.

Guy number 1: talked about weight and calories and it stung (I was overweight years ago and I struggled but I lost a lot of it.) That turned me off from him fast due to being nervous to eat anywhere near him. He asked me two days later to go on a second date and it took me a day to answer him but I told him it wouldn't work out. Telling the truth in that way is actually out of my comfort zone but I did it.

Guy number 2: Pulled a Nintendo DS out of his pocket which reminded me of my cousin and that was an instant no.

Guy number 3: I was really looking forward to this date. It was changed by a day and where we were going. We were supposed to go to a waterfront cafe Sunday but he couldn't drop his son off so he asked to change it. I was able to get him to change it to the next day. He decided a brewery. I have only drank beer once when I turned 21 and I disliked it. However, trying to get out of my comfort zone, I said yes. I traveled 40 minutes to get to his area. The date ended with a hug before I parted but I really enjoyed the date a lot. I texted him when I got home and he had laughed and said glad you made it home. That's the last I have heard from him. I texted him "morning" the next morning because it's what I do.

I did notice he has been online on the site we met on but I haven't viewed his profile.

Guy number 3, is this dating etiquette or am I just being ghosted and need to just not bother hoping for another date?
Active Ink Slinger
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Generally when it comes to dating you have to remember that you don't know the person well but they generally show you who they are by their actions. Now it's not been long so maybe dude number three is busy but if he is blowing you off then take that as an indication of his personality and move on. Dating etiquette is a crock of shit to give people excuses to play games. I've always been authentic, if I want to say hello I do and fuck them if that's against their rule book.

You don't owe anybody anything but neither do they owe you. Just have fun out there!
"A dirty book is rarely dusty"
Convict
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Just be yourself. If someone decides they don't want to text you back saying good morning then they really aren't worth your time. You've left the ball in their court. If they don't contact you within a reasonable amount of time then do you really want to pursue them? Someone better for you is out there.
Chat Moderator
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Quote by Smoothwetkitty


Guy number 3, is this dating etiquette or am I just being ghosted and need to just not bother hoping for another date?


Don't give him another thought... Continue to enjoy life keep your eyes open and wait for that guy that just doesn't want the date to end... The guy that can't wait to see you again... Oh and leave your comfort zone for things you haven't tried, not for things you know you don't like ;) Good luck!
characterized by intense feeling; passionate; fervent

Intensely devoted, eager, or enthusiastic; zealous

vehement; fierce burning, fiery, or hot
Active Ink Slinger
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dont drown in the 'what if's'... fill up your schedule with more dates and choose variety! Its time to really see with your eyes what you want, so dont settle and dont raise the bar so high no one can reach.
never ever ever wait... keep going forward smile
Wild at Heart
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Quote by trinket
Just be yourself.


...I think that's where you've been going wrong.
Wild at Heart
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Quote by trinket


Ahhh my Magical_Fanclub. Deep down you know you want me, you just won't admit it.



I know people talk about the power of positive thinking n shit... and honestly I don't have the heart to burst your bubble. Keep visualizing your dreams trinket. Bless.
Fancy Schmancy
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This is how I see it: you met on a dating site, so he knows you are interested in dating. He has done a couple of things that are not great signs he is interested in continuing to date you: unilaterally changing the location of the date, and not returning your text. I don't know that his continuing to be active on the dating site after one date with you is a bad sign. From what you have said, you have been nice, and accommodating and have shown an interest in him. I think you have given enough indication of your interest such that if he were interested, he would respond, and he hasn't.

Continue to date and pay attention to what does and does not appeal to you; good luck!
Lurker
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Quote by LaylaJune
This is how I see it: you met on a dating site, so he knows you are interested in dating. He has done a couple of things that are not great signs he is interested in continuing to date you: unilaterally changing the location of the date, and not returning your text. I don't know that his continuing to be active on the dating site after one date with you is a bad sign. From what you have said, you have been nice, and accommodating and have shown an interest in him. I think you have given enough indication of your interest such that if he were interested, he would respond, and he hasn't.

Continue to date and pay attention to what does and does not appeal to you; good luck!



I've washed my hands of him now so I am going to continue to go on dates, Had another one today and it was way better than the one on Monday.
Fancy Schmancy
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Quote by Smoothwetkitty



I've washed my hands of him now so I am going to continue to go on dates, Had another one today and it was way better than the one on Monday.


Hope you meet someone really great!
Active Ink Slinger
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The first two sound like it's good you lost them. A gentleman lets you lead the conversation, maybe providing teasers if you're not opening up. With the third guy, it's possibly a guy thing. I don't care how much I liked somebody, I tend to wait a couple of days for next contact (I don't want to appear too eager or that I don't have much else to do). I'm always put off a little by somebody contacting me the next morning, but maybe that's just me - it's never prohibited a relationship from evolving if all the stars line up.

Blanket statement (of course, there are exceptions): Men and women tend to misrepresent themselves during 'dating'. People think of it as 'putting their best foot forward'. But in my extensive years of relationships and dating, the longer you go on with each other, the more you find they aren't the people they claimed to be on the first few dates (often what you get is just fine, though), and no, she DOESN'T like action movies, sports or whatever else she claimed, and of course, the same goes for the fibs men tell about themselves.

Dating sucks. Give me a good hookup site any day.
Active Ink Slinger
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Hope the dating is continuing to improve for you.