I have found the longer my wife and I are married the more modest she is getting. I am not sure why.
He body looks good and I express this all the time in a honest genuine way, she still looks hot to me.
We have been together for over thirty years and this was not and issue when we were both younger, I am six years older than her.
I am in not bad shape for my age and thought as she got older she would be less modest, time would seem to do this I thought.
But the opposite seems to be the case. I have read in the forums some women are like my wife.
I can not ever recalling saying anything negative to her about anything about her body, I still ravage her in bed.
Why do some women become more self conscious around a mate she has been in bed with for so many years?
We made babies together I have taken care of her when sick, complement her with loving statements, nothing works.
Like some women when she looks in the mirror she sees mostly only her flaws, I see a hoot women.
Do other couple who have been married all this time find modest becomes worse, if so why?
To be honest it gets frustrating when you want to relax naked next to your lover and she can not relax.
This was not always the case, that is what is puzzling, why it my wife less comfortable with me or mature women in general?
Old in chronological age. But young at heart and desire.
Two things:
1. Women's bodies and their perceptions of their bodies change. A lot. Well, people in general. But I digress. Aging takes a toll on the psyche and self-esteem. You may think she's perfect, but she may be thinking about that extra wrinkle that wasn't there a year ago. Factor in giving birth and the toll it takes on the body, and all types of external messages she may be receiving. Self-consciousness is a bitch. Be sensitive to that.
2. I'm sure you're gonna get lots of helpful (and perhaps not so helpful) insight in the replies to come. However, none of it will compare to actually talking to your wife about how she's feeling.
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Mine has always been quite modest. Dresses nicely when we're out but never especially sexy. Even her swimsuits are as modest as they come these days. I kind of like it as long as it comes off around me (which it does). Makes her my secret or something like that.
I have a similar problem in my marriage. My wife is self conscious of her body, which is quite in great shape. She's 59, very petite, and is sexy. But in her attitude she is so straitlaced she makes Mother Teresa look look a pole dancer. We no longer have sex, haven't in years. She seems to have completely lost all interest in sex. She doesn't seem to have a yen for anyone else either, so infidelity isn't an issue. I'm at a complete loss. She never did have a sex drive that came close to mine. The kids are grown and gone so it's like "Alright, done with all that nastiness. Anyone for a snack?" I have had to content myself with viewing porn and masturbating for release. Not how I intended to end up! If you get an answer, pass it along. Until then, you are not alone, my friend.
Wow, your posts really speak to me - something I feared could happen all through married life. I have spent over 40 years telling my wife how wonderful she looks - constantly. She is very vain, and suspicious of my compliments, but she actually is still quite "hot to trot". She's age 62, 5'2", 113 pounds, a red head, and she did enjoy sex before I met her in college. For years she carried guilt from those early escapades, and that seemed to limit what she was interested in doing in bed, but I continued to pursue her AND ALWAYS MADE SURE SHE ORGASMED INSTEAD OF ME. Her previous partners had been typical teens - getting out of control and spewing all before she could say ho hum. Of course, children are long gone, and sex today is better than it was 20 years ago. She is much quicker to cum than she used to be (warmups could take the better part of an hour before she would cum), and she can even orgasm just warming me up and then hopping on "cowgirl" and riding to ecstasy. And, she can also be multi-orgasmic - anywhere from 2 to 15 times as I have learned how to manage her triggers. I occasionally bring her flowers for no reason, we kiss frequently, I take her shopping for clothes, Christmas often sports something wonderful (she is a sucker for nice jewelry), and I recently bought her a car because her arthritis complains when she drives the little Cobalt that has standard transmission - hard on her. Is it all wonderful? Of course, not! But it is pretty good. And we've cultivated mutual interests in later years so that we wouldn't grow apart. I don't think this helps anyone reading it, but showering attention on your wife in as many ways as you can can't hurt. Best...
Wow, your posts really speak to me - something I feared could happen all through married life. I have spent over 40 years telling my wife how wonderful she looks - constantly. She is very vain, and suspicious of my compliments, but she actually is still quite "hot to trot". She's age 62, 5'2", 113 pounds, a red head, and she did enjoy sex before I met her in college. For years she carried guilt from those early escapades, and that seemed to limit what she was interested in doing in bed, but I continued to pursue her AND ALWAYS MADE SURE SHE ORGASMED INSTEAD OF ME. Her previous partners had been typical teens - getting out of control and spewing all before she could say ho hum. Of course, children are long gone, and sex today is better than it was 20 years ago. She is much quicker to cum than she used to be (warmups could take the better part of an hour before she would cum), and she can even orgasm just warming me up and then hopping on "cowgirl" and riding to ecstasy. And, she can also be multi-orgasmic - anywhere from 2 to 15 times as I have learned how to manage her triggers. I occasionally bring her flowers for no reason, we kiss frequently, I take her shopping for clothes, Christmas often sports something wonderful (she is a sucker for nice jewelry), and I recently bought her a car because her arthritis complains when she drives the little Cobalt that has standard transmission - hard on her. Is it all wonderful? Of course, not! But it is pretty good. And we've cultivated mutual interests in later years so that we wouldn't grow apart. I don't think this helps anyone reading it, but showering attention on your wife in as many ways as you can can't hurt. Best...
I have noticed the same issue
