Recently my wife told me she wouldn't care if she never had sex again! I'm at a loss how to take this!
We have been married for 7 years and my better half has always had a lower sex drive than myself. We Are open and talk through our fantasies and desires, but there's always end up as one sided conversations as she says she has no fantasies or desires!
I don't expect her to be a nympho, but surely she has some sexual wants or desires! It's knocked me into limbo as now I don't no if I should bother trying it on with her or if this will push her away, perhaps I'm just a shit lay!
Any way I'd love to hear others experiences or advice regarding this issue
Don't let it go on too long. Snuggle, kiss, caress but without any expectations on her part. Let her know you love her. Really love her, not just to get in her pants love. Love her. I lost my husband to this. I strayed and was banished. As we are really good friends I am trying to figure out if we can start again after two and a half years apart. That is what I crave and want and expect. Women are tired at the end of the day. Men have a much higher sex drive than women. Do your best to not think about straying. It's not worth it. Ramblings but I hope it helps.
Don't let it go on too long?
BTDT, working on the second time. She says "sex is disgusting when I think about it". It's been over 1 year, I've done the laundry, fixed dinner, make comments about how good she looks & touch/rub her when she lets me.
Nothing works.
Previous marriage, I went 5 years without sex, finally after she gave up on even trying to cook a simple meal for me & her, I left. Hurt like he77, but in the end I think it was for the best. Been with the gal I'm with for over 10 years, sex just isn't in the equation.
Women are tired at the end of the day? Maybe if they do laundry, keep the house, work away from the house & care for the kids. Not this one. Disabled & requires chronic medical management.
If I could get her to agree, I'd hire a live in Fbuddy. I do love her & would do anything for her, but the lack of sex just isn't cutting it anymore. I'm not going to wait another 4 years to put my dick in a pussy.
I may be middle aged, but I'm active & happy.
Love to get to know you.
It's just how I think it might work. As a single woman now, I crave touch more than anything. A hug and a back rub. A foot tickle. These things I want. It doesn't equate to sex, I know but it creates intimacy and that can lead to who knows what.
Well actually the thing is... how do you know her needs and wants well? And how does she knows yours well and how she responds to it? You have to meet half way otherwise you'd feel like straying because she doesn't meet your sexual expectations (not just fucking her because obviously a human can fuck any one if they want it even if they are married or whatever status they are).
I doubt that she doesn't have sexual desires. Maybe lack of sex drive might happen because her lack of interest to your desires. It's actually for you to discover her soft spot. If you're a submissive type who likes being controlled, I don't think that will work out for her because obviously she's not into that for now. I guess you really need to find out what may turn her on. Perhaps you already know a few but it doesn't interest you that much?
If you love her and she loves you back, I think it will work out. Otherwise you won't be asking this question here.
I could show you INCREDIBLE things...
Thanks for the replies. With regard to her needs and wants I have sat and asked her what I can do to satisfy her or fulfill her, whether that's sexual or not
Sounds very familiar to me. My wife has never had the sex drive I have and has slowly over the past 35 years gotten less and less sexual. I've contemplated an affair from time to time but then I think about the two of us and what we have together and it's just not worth the turmoil. our life together isn't all about sex, it's a small part that I wish were better but I know that will never be the case. I've talked to her about many times and she just isn't into sex as much as I am. I guess it comes down to how much you love her and whether you can satisfy your urges without cheating on her. I workout a lot more and write ( erotic and non erotic ) to help get my mind away from what I'm missing. I wish you luck.
I'm not a Dr of any kind, but have studied human sexuality since I was in my early teens. My father subscribed to a publication titled Sexology Magazine. After we had our talks he gave me and my 3 younger brothers the magazine to read as we got old enough. We were able to talk openly about any issues that came up. It was similar to Penthouse Forum but presented in more of an educational and scientific format.
How was your sex life with your wife before & right after getting married? Do y'all have any children? Do you know of anything that may have caused her to not be interested in sex. Something that may have happened when she was younger. Something that would have been very tragic to her. How about her religious up bringing? Some Christian and other religions teach, "that to enjoy sex is a sin".
If she is close to your age this should be her hottest years. If it is not a mental issue as mentioned above it could be physical. Like low hormone production. It is good that y'all talk about it even if one sided. If you have not told her you need to let her know you are frustrated about the lack of good sex in your relationship. Also you should ask her if your performance is an issue. Let her know you will not be upset if it is. Better to get it out in the open between the 2 of you so the changes that need to be made can get under way.
This is only a tiny tip of what can be a very big iceberg. There are very many physical and mental issues than can cause her to be uninterested in sex. A lot of them can be fixed.
Feel free to ask me any thing you wish. On top of studying the scientific side Brandie and I have a very active sex life.
Nawty
I'm at that point now. I have turned bi as found a guy satisfying and looking for a mmf or mff situation
We have each found our own means of satisfaction. She is celibate and me a sex crazed maniac watching porn and jacking off al day long. I have affairs to care for my more intimate needs and she just turns her back.
