Hi everyone, havent logged in a long time!!
Basically i just need general dating advice..... There's a guy i met on a dating site, seems like a perfect match, for me anyway, and i really wanna meet him. Ive asked him out and he's agreed but in a non-commital way, i.e. hasnt arranged a time/place. He has said he'll pop into my work to see me but i dont know if/when he will. If not I might try and set an actual date with him.
In the mean time, I dont know how much to talk to him. I know this seems like a really stupid question but i am crap at this kind of thing. I dont wanna annoy him or put him off.... Even in relationships i just dont know how to..... be. This is hard to explain but does anyone have any advice?
I think if i waited to do that I'd never be in a relationship again! If we were to meet face to face and go on a date it would be fine I just dunno if i should be messaging him, keeping the conversation flowing or just wait for him to pop up.
Basically, show you're keen, dont let him get away but risk coming across as a psycho stalker OR let him come to me, play it cool, but run the risk of him thinking 'well she's not interested' (which 9/10 is the outcome for me)
What I usually do in this situation is just play it cool, be myself. Never over do it and try to be something that you're not. Most people see right through that.
Also, don't give the impression of being desperate or needy. Pretend you're the sort of person who has loads of women chasing you all the time.
Myself, on a first date, I act cool and aloof, and respond to questions with one word answers such as "cool" or "whatever" and run my fingers through my hair every now and then. You mark my words, that gets them going.
Whatever you do don't give up the good. You are looking for the one. Unless sex is very important to you then you do need to have sex with him, a few times before you make your mind up. Sex is never the same so you have to get a broader idea of how you two gel in that way. He's sound like he enjoys playing games. I hate guys like that. They give the rest of us a bad name. But girls seem to really go for that kind of thing. If you do have sex with him make sure you tell him your thoughts before hand: hey cumming one way or another. So if you can't do it for me then that's a shame because I really thought we could have been. (Something along those lines) Just keep in mind 'the one' has the most potential to hurt your heart. So take it slow. I know you want to get in the sack and fall in love. I don't want to see you get hurt by anyone less then 'the one'.
Dating sites are no good. Here is way: you're going on a date with someone before you even know them.
That is just dumb. Most of the time you'll find guys say/write what they think the girl wants to hear/read, and for the most part that works. Two things will happen: 1 you meet the guy and he acts nothing like his words portray himself. 2. He acts just like the words portray him. Either way it is just an act. The difference is #2 will take longer for the girl to realize what the guy is really about.
Find an honest guy you know in person and interact with him. No need to go on dates. Then one day you can make up your mind if you want this guy to be your husband or nah. And dating would not had to come into play.
I say find an honest guy because it will cut through a lot of the bull shit. It is shocking how many guys act in ways that are not themselves. I'll use myself as an example who I am online is who I am in real life, however, only the people care and trust and love see this side of me in person and much more. The rest of the people I meet in person they are not important enough for me to care enough to open up to them. It takes a while for me to do that.
You need to peer into yourself and see what qualities you like. Do you need someone that is strong and always serious? Or maybe carefree and funny? The way you know you like someone deeply is by interacting with them--no dating needed. Human nature is difficult to describe. For love you have to let your heart guide you, not your mind. It sounds corny but it really works. But I'm going to tell you love is never the easy path. Even if you meet your soulmate, that love is more difficult in the face of your soulmate. Both of you will have to rises to each other.
Hahaha damn I'm so poetic.
Ok so.... you're saying its shocking how many people are not themselves but go out there and find an honest one?? Yea easier said than done!
That would get me going home. Quickly. On my own. Or is that just if you don't like them?
