I have been on this wonderful website for almost 2 years. I have noticed a high amount of turnover with the members of this site. I wonder why so many people come and go? Are they here for the real purpose of lush, to read and write erotica, or are they here cause they think this is a quick cure to the bulge in there pants, and when they don't get the relief, they leave?
I think the reason may be:
Life is fast here, speeded up a thousand-fold. Relationships blossom and die in days. Others get involved, take sides; people are shunned, leave in a huff. New lovers come and go as virtual relationships can soon lose their fire. People quickly get bored, need new stimuli. It's the way of the modern world: why work at what you've got when something new is around the corner? Especially something titillating and off-limits. It's immature, childish, and promotes a shallow, superficial existence that perfectly suits the free market economy. Sex, consumerism and the internet were simply made for each other.
And then, of course, real-life partners suspect the worst, check histories, confront and threaten. We never evolved for this. It happened too fast. The choices are too great; the temptations too vast; and the flesh is very, very weak...
"If I sign off with pithy quotations, ignore all preceding opinion for I am undoubtedly a fool. And if, after our discourse, I abuse you by proffering my vulgar produce, cast me into the gutter."
I agree with your statement, it makes sense. I mean, yeah it's real easy to get involved with someone on here. But, why do people not realize at some point, this is the internet, not real life. I know it is easy to dream and get distracted, but they don't have the wear with all, to realize it is nothing more than fantasy here?
I get on everyday from work, but I am not staying on it to the point of me getting in trouble, I was lucky enough to have a woman who loves reading the stories with me, which I am very thankful for. I guess, I just don't understand having something that is not in front of me. Its not from lack of imagination, its more of how can you develop feelings for someone you have never meet, and probably never will. But hey, what ever floats there boats.
Lush is a community. But unlike the communities we actually live in, when things go sour, we can disappear. Even come back as someone else if we so choose. All done at the click of a button. Real bonds are formed here. These bonds may mean more to one than they do to another. One may leave because the closeness feels too restricting. Another may leave because of this rejection.
Others come for cheap thrills, and they find them. And then they get bored and move along.
Some go because of embarrassment, humiliation, petty drama, etc. Or maybe it gets too 'real' so they leave as a preventative measure. And then there are those who are in it for the long haul.
There are so many different kinds of people and interactions and relationships here. And if it's not to anyone's liking, or if one bites off more than they can chew, they simply move on.
The thing about the internet is that you can create your own experience. Your own reality, even. And if that falls apart, you can either move on or recreate. The former's a lot easier.
░P░U░S░S░Y░ ░I░N░ ░B░I░O░
There are many reason why a person comes and goes off of any site when it on here or else where. It could be that the topics that are being discuss with people, to someone not telling the ones in their real life and keeping it from them, or the stories that one wants to be write until they find out there is a process of rules to go by, or someone reading the stories getting board. The turn over rate might seem to be high vs. the people that actual staying is more. I would like to see those numbers play against each other just to know which weights more.
I also think that a lot of people try to be something they are not. Over time it is very hard to maintain a lie, or to be kinder, a fictional persona.
Sometimes you join a site like this and receive attention that you never wanted or just didn't expect the drama that sometimes happens on sites like these. Appeal also can be lost over time when members who are single find someone in their real life.
It's been common to me to find that people 'get caught' and disappear.
And then, of course, real-life partners suspect the worst, check histories, confront and threaten. ... (quote) Definitely. When I had all my stories available, someone accused me of writing about her husband. That was the first for me, very awkward.
How real it can get!
I have looked for just the right girl all my grown life. Recently, I met that girl and of all places on Lush. We knew we were right for each other. Both being married our relationship became an issue in her marriage. When she told me she had to take care of her husband I was devastated. I knew she was right, but I did not expect to be completely in her past.
Leaving Lush certainly crossed my mind because every time I open the site I will think of her for the rest of my life.
I have only been here a short time, but I've been an admin on another site for 5 years and a high turnover rate seems pretty common online. People join and look for whatever it is they're looking for, and then give up and leave when they don't find it. There's always a core membership who work at making a site succeed, and the gadflies who flit around looking for diversion from one site to another. This site seems to have a fairly devoted core membership and maybe that's due to the central theme here which is story-telling. Some are the storytellers and some are the audience, but they are all here for the stories. The ones who come and go are looking for other things: romance, attention, or even drama, but those things are ancillary to the mission of the site, so those people appear and disappear frequently. I've yet to figure out the social dynamic on this site, so this is just my neophytic first assessment. I may be full of shit! lol
The real life vs online fantasy life what a dangerous two edge sword it is. We might need to start up a new topic (if it is not made as of yet) How to open up in real life about this site if doing it in secret. Sometime people will do things that will cause drama such as asking for or giving personal e-mail address once a connection has been establish to doing video sex chats when their panther is away. We all have to remember sometimes you have to comfort what is making you unhappy or missing in your relationship to make it better...that is if you want to make it better. If not do stuff that will cause headaches and problems just in the end everyone will lose.
Not active enough to be informed.
it's really easy to leave when shit gets a little too deep online. lush allows people to be reckless in a variety of ways - whether it be romantic or malicious. there are times when i absolutely detest this (example, when someone comes back with a shiny new profile only to wreck havoc).
however, the revolving door also offers the opportunity for people to regain their bearing and return better equipped to handle a virtual world. for better or worse, i hope it never changes. second chances are always welcome and experience is worth its weight in gold.
