Join the best erotica focused adult social network now
Login

Hookup - Psychology

last reply
10 replies
1.3k views
0 watchers
0 likes
Lurker
0 likes
Interested on your take on this...

If a guy waits a week after having sex to block you - what does it mean? I'm not angry, just curious and ok - a little hurt. Why not simply unfriend? Or better yet, stay friends with benefits? It's not like I sent the guy Farmville request, hostile pms or stalked him. I just found out - as I was debating whether to send him a message or unfriend him (but I guess he beat me to it).
Alpha Blonde
0 likes
Hmm... this is kind of strange, I agree.

Some possibilities:

- He's no longer interested in hooking up and doesn't want to deal with explaining himself, saying no, or getting around it, so he picks the easiest way to avoid the situation altogether and assumes you'll get the hint. Basically washing his hands of the whole thing - the immature route.

- He cheated on someone and is trying to avoid getting caught.

- There's someone else in the picture - that he's gotten more serious about - and he's cleaning house of all recent hook-ups in an attempt to avoid detection by way of flirty Facebook wall posts, pic comments or messages. Not to mention, if he's the type to 'share' passwords with a GF, this would be a 'must'.

All in all, I can totally see why you'd be hurt. Not sure how long you knew him before the hook-up but he sounds like the type that'll be easy to get over. Kind of a tacky move, really. I don't get why people can't just be adults about it.
Advanced Wordsmith
0 likes
What Dancing Doll said is right on...

From a guy's point of view.. if he did this I think you have two possibilities:
1) something didn't go "well". You didn't give any details about your relationship with him and how things went when you did the deed.. maybe something happened you didn't realize and rather than be mature about it and tell you he just took the wuss way out and just blocked you.. problem solved the immature way.

2) He is already in a relationship.. and he is afraid of getting caught. Or maybe he did get caught and this is part of the fallout..

It could also be the other things like "cleaning house" or etc.. but really I think you are just dealing with an immature person. Obviously not worth your time or your sex.
Lurker
0 likes
Agree with the other replies. It's either a total panic move because he cheated on someone with you - or he is an immature jerk. I believe in karma - what goes around, comes around. Find someone more worthy of you... Guys like that get their due sooner or later. You can always get a voodoo doll of him and stick a needle in him right where it counts! smile
Lurker
0 likes
Quote by chatnstroke
You can always get a voodoo doll of him and stick a needle in him right where it counts! smile


This made me laugh. :) Thank you for your enlightening replies. I really appreciate it. I'm thinking I didn't know him after all and I'm better off. Feeling slightly better though the possibility that I was somehow party to another woman being cheated on makes me feel awful. I hope this wasn't the case.

I thought that it might have been my fault as I may not have been what you would call "overtly" emotional.
Lurker
0 likes
Quote by celaenoeos


This made me laugh. smile Thank you for your enlightening replies. I really appreciate it. I'm thinking I didn't know him after all and I'm better off. Feeling slightly better though the possibility that I was somehow party to another woman being cheated on makes me feel awful. I hope this wasn't the case.

I thought that it might have been my fault as I may not have been what you would call "overtly" emotional.


Glad the replies provided you something. If there was another woman, I understand why you would feel awful BUT you were ignorant to that so it should be HIM who has the regrets. Not knowing more than I do, I highly doubt it was your fault - his behavior indicates it's all his...
0 likes
I know of two reasons:

1.) Sometimes we block people in extreme circumstances because they are too crazy to wish to mess with or seem like they would be, and may not want to chance it.

2.) If you did not give any impression or past indication of being over-the-top in ways they might be uncomfortable and wish to avoid (even in conversation), then sometimes a person can block you when they have someone else. (Someone or something they do not want to see you or you to see, or something else written.) They may not want you to know but still keep you around so they can re-add you later and unblock you when the coast is clear or incase the tryst or whatever doesn't pan out, Should they need~ it keeps you on the string.

3.) There could be other reasons - like the person is petty and it is a get back...
4.) They could be paranoid, too, maybe, (about what I do not know) but I am leaning toward Number Two if it was a casual deal without any drama or reasons to be paranoid.

These are all I can think of.

I DO NOT recommend the voodoo doll. Things have a way of coming back around.
Active Ink Slinger
0 likes
I think you are better off to not worry too much when someone decides not to stay friends. It is their loss, not yours. BUT I do find it kind of strange that you were going to unfriend the guy. For what reason did you decide you wished to unfriend him?
Not having much of the background info, it is hard to give a good explanation of his reasons.
Lurker
0 likes
Quote by 1LovelyKinkyKitsune

I DO NOT recommend the voodoo doll. Things have a way of coming back around.


No, I won't be doing any voodoo. smile Too much effort and he isn't worth it...plus the fact that voodoo dolls scare the pants off me.
Active Ink Slinger
0 likes
Quote by celaenoeos
Interested on your take on this...

If a guy waits a week after having sex to block you - what does it mean? I'm not angry, just curious and ok - a little hurt. Why not simply unfriend? Or better yet, stay friends with benefits? It's not like I sent the guy Farmville request, hostile pms or stalked him. I just found out - as I was debating whether to send him a message or unfriend him (but I guess he beat me to it).

Because he is a stupid ass who doesn't know how to unfriend you....like I don't know how to do so either! I just know how to block. That's a slimy move babe!!! Very hurtful and exactly why I don't have sex without love. Learned long ago. Don't give someone your naked body until they love your naked soul...quote/misquote...same meaning. Sorry girl. Hopefully, you had fun and are emotionally unscathed.
Lurker
0 likes
Quote by justalilfun
I think you are better off to not worry too much when someone decides not to stay friends. It is their loss, not yours. BUT I do find it kind of strange that you were going to unfriend the guy. For what reason did you decide you wished to unfriend him?
Not having much of the background info, it is hard to give a good explanation of his reasons.


It was the first time I'd hooked up casually without being emotionally vested in the relationship. Purely sexual.