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Sex Buddies

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Rookie Scribe
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So I have this female friend and we ended up getting drunk and having sex one night.

We didn't panic or freak out the next day, we had both had an amazing time.

Long story short we decided to become sex buddies.

So my question to you ladies, Have you had a sex buddy? Did it end messy? And how did you manage to keep things from getting too serious?
Lurker
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Yes I have had a fuck buddy. No it didn't end messy, it just fizzled out one day. I kept things from getting too serious by not seeing him too often, and never outside that role, for example, making him a 'regular' friend.
Active Ink Slinger
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congrats on being mature!!!and i dont mean that in a bad way but a good one!

no i dont have sex unless i love someone. though there IS ZERO wrong with that i want to stress.

i am a firm believer that eventually one of you will fall for the other

if you are friends and have amazing mind numbing sex...well what ELSE could you look for in a partner

have you, though had sex sober?

honesty and communication will keep it from getting sticky

when you are ready to leave you tell her straight up...no avoiding no dodging calls no text break ups or facebook quits....ok

you tell her...

she might be mad, she might not be..but she will remember you as a good guy

and that advice you can not only use with a a future gf but anything you do in life

be honest and be kind...
Active Ink Slinger
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I used to have fuckbuddies when I didn't have a boyfriend.
Mostly I spent much time with them because I like to have a lot of sex and don't like to have more then 1 fuckbuddy.
Having more then 1 fuckbuddy is asking for problems I think.
Sometimes it became a bit complicated because it happens that you come at a point that you both know you don't want to be serious with eich other, but there are definetaly feelings.

Mostly I had a great time.
If you both are clear and honest it should work out I suppose.
Lurker
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I do have a friend and we agree on nothing, and we have little in common. But the sex is some of the best either of us have had. Well that is our story!

I see him only 2 or 3 times a year. It keeps it hot when were are together and also keeps our differences out of the arena. It has worked well for several years and I hope for a few more.
Active Ink Slinger
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Yup. I had a couple of FWB. I always had a rule that if either of us met someone else, then it was back to being platonic friends.

With one guy, it was perfect. If either of us became single again and needed to "scratch that itch" per se, I'm sure we'd call each other. For us, it worked marvelously.
With the other... Not so much. He wanted more than I was willing to give. I felt pressured into trying to make it into a relationship.
I liked him, but I didn't love him. He kept tossing out the "I love you's" and expected me to say the same.
He needed a caregiver/mother and I wasn't looking for that.
Active Ink Slinger
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Sorry, not my style. Besides, those types of relationships, despite one's initial intentions, usually end up being way more complicated than they're worth. Kudos to those who can have their cake and eat it too
Alpha Blonde
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This kind of situation can become a total mess pretty quickly but if both people have the right 'perspective' on the connection, it works really well.

You both need to have open communication and be aware of feelings that may creep up unexpectedly. When they do, things need to be dialled down and/or discussed if you want to preserve the 'friendship element'. I find it's more likely to get complicated when you're already friends with the person and hanging out with them and then just occasionally hook up. If you already like spending time with the person and the sex is great, you're much more likely to have one party confusing it for dating or a potentially budding relationship.

It works better when it's more of a booty-call situation and all you have in common is sex, or a situation that precludes getting too emotionally involved (eg. being long-distance, conflicting schedules, lifestyles that don't jive, personality clashes). If you're not attracted to them or interested in them other than as a sexual prospect, then you're more likely to just enjoy it for what it is, without entertaining that 'what if' factor.

I've had sex buddy situations that have worked and others that have failed. Each one seems to have a different dynamic.
Lurker
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I've only had sex with guys I've been in relationships. One ex wanted a FWB to a great degree but I knew it definitely would not work out, then again, I'm the type of girl that just couldn't do the FWB thing.
Bonnet Flaunter
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I've only done this to a limited extent and with guys I would call very good friends. Although the booty-call-with-not-much-else-in-common sounds eminently sensible if not wanting to get involved with a sex partner, I just need to really like someone before being sexually interested in them. It didn't work with one guy, because he wanted to control things and call the shots which I found gradually wearying, and so the sex (and eventually the friendship too) got politely refused. However with another guy, an on/off thang over a few years only deepened our closeness and friendship, and no, we've never become an item, but I'm not sure if we'd have become the lasting friends we are without that sexual element and understanding of each other. I hope things between you and your friend work out and you have a lot of fun together! smile
Rookie Scribe
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Hmm lots of different perspectives on this, what a great community there is here.

I think I am going to break it off with her tomorrow.

She is a couple years younger than me and seems to be getting overly attached in an emotional sense .

Good to be able to recognise these warning signs from the advice you have all shared. Thanks Ladies smile
Active Ink Slinger
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I have had several fuck buddies and with the exception of one, it has worked out really well. I (we) have one now and it is great. We are all friends and it is just a purely sexual thing. He doesnt want any relationship with anyone at this time in his life, he is in his mid 30's, divorced with 2 kids and his kids and job take up all his time. Of course that could change but for right now, its wonderful!! We get to have our cake and eat it too!! LOL

To the OP, make sure you try it sober before you get to excited about thsi arrangement.
Active Ink Slinger
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Double Posted, Sorry
Active Ink Slinger
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Grrrffrrrrrrrrrrr
Lurker
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Quote by oldhound
Grrrffrrrrrrrrrrr



What? do you have a furball stuck in your throat or something?
Lurker
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I have had fuck buddies, 3 different ladies at the same time..........it all got too serious and stressy, especially the lady that had me fuck her the day before her wedding ;-)
Active Ink Slinger
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Usually do , Ms trinket, yes lol. I tend to shed as it gets warmer. Bad today though, raining, smell like a wet...eh close enough to German shephard lol