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Anal sex

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Passion87
Rookie Scribe
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Ive been wanting to loose my anal virginity for awhile now, but I have heard some good stories and bad stories, is there anything I can do to prepare my self?
blazestcyr
Active Ink Slinger
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butt plugs?? perhaps small dildos in that area..maybe finger play??
Guest
Lurker
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RELAX! No matter what you do to "prepare" yourself, if you are not relaxed you end up fighting against yourself and the experience. This goes for both men and women. But yes, as blaze said, butt plugs, small dildos, fingers, or anything really that will get you used to "things" in that area will work great. And then, make sure your partner is caring and understands that anal is NOT the same as vaginal, so it is often best to do a lot more "warming up" before going hard at it. Good luck!
Dancing_Doll
Alpha Blonde
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You can buy anal lube for the first time especially. It's thicker than regular lube and will ease entry.

I'd recommend some solo play at first. Start with a butt-plug, fingers, small toy. Get used to the sensation before playing with a partner. Then you know what to expect and what sensations you'll feel and are probably less likely to be anxious when you actually do it with a guy.

Make sure you have good communication with the guy and that he knows to go slow at first and to listen to you - if you need him to go slower or stop or pause etc.

Some people make a bigger deal out of anal than is really needed, so try to put that out of your mind. It's not scary and it *will* feel good if you do it right and build the intensity slowly. Be open to it and think about the pleasure. You don't want to clench up or stress about it beforehand. Have a few drinks, make sure you're really turned on before starting, and have your partner start with fingers and tongue first.

Have fun. smile
Guest
Lurker
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Oh.... good additions. smile

I think I need to also state that size DOES matter more for anal than vaginal. Some people just can't get used to very large partners in the rear. It is what it is. So with this too, a lot goes into whether it will truly be an enjoyable experience. Sometimes, as with a lot of things, compatibility just isn't there. But I think for most, it is quite alright. And even if your partner is too large for you, that does not mean you can't still have ass play, and have him help you out. I think most guys would still find that perfectly acceptable. ;)
Guest
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I have always tried to choose a partner for anal sex that is not extremely large (whatever that means). I still feel that even if he is large we can still have satisfying sex and I would consider myself lucky.
Nikki703
Active Ink Slinger
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Quote by Dancing_Doll
You can buy anal lube for the first time especially. It's thicker than regular lube and will ease entry.

I'd recommend some solo play at first. Start with a butt-plug, fingers, small toy. Get used to the sensation before playing with a partner. Then you know what to expect and what sensations you'll feel and are probably less likely to be anxious when you actually do it with a guy.

Make sure you have good communication with the guy and that he knows to go slow at first and to listen to you - if you need him to go slower or stop or pause etc.

Some people make a bigger deal out of anal than is really needed, so try to put that out of your mind. It's not scary and it *will* feel good if you do it right and build the intensity slowly. Be open to it and think about the pleasure. You don't want to clench up or stress about it beforehand. Have a few drinks, make sure you're really turned on before starting, and have your partner start with fingers and tongue first.

Have fun. smile


Very Well Said!!!

ENJOY!!!!
1nympholes
Active Ink Slinger
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Dancing Doll gave you good advice and all I can add is do whatever it takes to get relaxed.

I was very relaxed the first time and it was a very pleasant experience.

If you find the first time less than you had hoped, please do not give up, I have friends that need a time or two to get what they wanted for the beauty of anal sex.

Good Luck and let us know how things worked out for you
crazydiamond
Clever Gem
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Quote by 1nympholes
Dancing Doll gave you good advice and all I can add is do whatever it takes to get relaxed.

I was very relaxed the first time and it was a very pleasant experience.

If you find the first time less than you had hoped, please do not give up, I have friends that need a time or two to get what they wanted for the beauty of anal sex.

Good Luck and let us know how things worked out for you


Same here, I had not planned on it, or thought about it at all at the time. I was on top actually and decided all of a sudden that i wanted it, so I initiated it, it was fine, very hot!
Perhaps you being on top may help, you are in control of the depth and speed, which may help to relax you. Relaxation is imperative to enjoyable anal sex.
Nikki703
Active Ink Slinger
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Quote by crazydiamond


Same here, I had not planned on it, or thought about it at all at the time. I was on top actually and decided all of a sudden that i wanted it, so I initiated it, it was fine, very hot!


Being a spontaneous act most probably made it better since you didnt have time to tense up and you were already excited


Quote by crazydiamond
Perhaps you being on top may help, you are in control of the depth and speed, which may help to relax you. Relaxation is imperative to enjoyable anal sex.


My first time it was doggy and it wasnt as great as I had hoped because he was a little to rough, neither of us had ever done it before. But the next time I was on top and in control and it was so much better.
wishful
Rookie Scribe
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First of all, you must ask yourself one question. Are you doing this for yourself, or for your partner? If you are doing it for yourself, you will have no trouble in reaching your goal, by following some of the steps that others have wisely given you.

Anal lube, butt plugs, fingering, going slow and so forth.

However, if you are doing this simply for your partner, then it may take a longer time in obtaining your goal. The reason being is: It’s not something you really desire or that you really wanted to try.

Taking into account, that you are asking this question, allow me to give you some tips that may just help you. First make sure your partner understands fully that YOU ARE IN CONTROL NOT HIM or HER! You are the only one that knows if it pleasure or pain.

Relaxation is the one of the keys so if you are not relaxed do not force it. That will only lead to disappointment and we do not want that, now do we?

Timing is also a key. Your frame of mind, will determent the out come. If you are in a state of mind that is passionate, willing and for lack of a better words, down right horny, you will have no trouble at all in obtaining your goal and you will have one of your finest sexual encounters of your life.

In the end, (No pun intended, just poor wording.) You will discover a few things out about yourself. You will either love it of hate it or something in between. You also will discover if you will like it slow or hard once you become accustom to it. In any case, it is never is a waste of time to try something new.

So with that I will wish you the best of luck and the good will
Dancing_Doll
Alpha Blonde
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Quote by Nikki703


Being a spontaneous act most probably made it better since you didnt have time to tense up and you were already excited.


My first time was spontaneous too. Although he's the one that initiated it 'in the moment'. I totally agree that there's a lot of positives to this - you just go with the flow without over-thinking it. If I had to do it over again, i'd definitely go with self-play first though. The reason people get anxious is the unknown of how it's going to feel, so it's ideal if you have some experimentation under your belt with fingers/toys.
kylie_kained
Detention Seeker
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Relax us plenty of lube and take it gently until you feel comfy.
Guest
Lurker
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Can't Help; I believe that hole is an exit only area!!
Guest
Lurker
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the advice you have been given is terrific but i agree you need to be this for yourself not your partner. Play with toys use plenty of lube and relax