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long distance BDSM relationship

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Active Ink Slinger
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Hi A/all just curious, How do you handle the long distance relationship. What special things do you do to keep connected. Offer some some suggestions and share with us what works for you.
No one can make you jealous, angry, vengeful, or greedy -unless you let him.
- Napoleon Hill
Flutterby Pharie
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Oh! I so want to chime in here......but I can't. Hope you get some good answers.
♥ Listen, touch, and look around in the air and on the ground. If you watch all nature's things, you might just see a fairy's wings. ♥
Active Ink Slinger
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Quote by Pixie
Oh! I so want to chime in here......but I can't. Hope you get some good answers.


Why can't you pixie?? You can post what works for you also....just saying
No one can make you jealous, angry, vengeful, or greedy -unless you let him.
- Napoleon Hill
Flutterby Pharie
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After much thought I decided to share what works for me/us. Texting daily, phone calls when we can swing it, naughty voicemails are awesome! You get to hear eachothers voices as you describe what is next to come, and of course this site! You can always chat and send PM's on here.
♥ Listen, touch, and look around in the air and on the ground. If you watch all nature's things, you might just see a fairy's wings. ♥
Rocker of the cocker
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I agree with what has been said so far. Texting, phone calls, being able to hear their voice makes it even more exciting. Lush is a big plus, sending PMs, checking in through out the day, sending/ receiving black boxes.. Chatting on cam works great too, seeing your submissive do as you please. The times you do get to actually spend together are very special, seeing as you don't see each other often.

In my experience, when in a long distance relationship, a submissive can be issued tasks and it's exciting knowing they are completing the task asked of them. Fully trusting each other 100%. Having them do things they normally wouldn't and to know they are enjoying it, can be very satisfying.
Cock Connoisseur
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I would have to agree with all that has been said thus far. Communication is key as it is in any relationship. Going about your day and getting a text message or an email from your Master was very exciting. I also have to agree that there has to be 100% trust on both sides for the relationship to grow. Using Skype is a wonderful way to be able to see each others faces and hear each others voices. There are many options out there to keep you and your love close, even if you are separated by miles whether it be hundreds, thousands or oceans apart.
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I also agree with what has been posted here, however at times I like to send pictures or videos of different scenarios that I would like to see happen - Call it a role play of sorts.

Black boxes, e-mails and PM's are also a good tool to be able to communicate throughout the day! Gotta love Lush!

Nothing can beat hearing the voice of someone though be it on or over the phone, in my opinion it's the next best thing to being together!
The night that changed my life, a four part series of a married man lusting after his co-worker

[URL=http://www.lushstories.com/stories/reluctance/the-night-that-changed-my-life-1.aspx][IMG]http://i.imgur.com/WPPsy.jpg[/IMG][/URL]
Active Ink Slinger
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First of all staying in contact via email, chat, text, cam and phone is most important of all to keep that special bond between you which creates trust. Then it is different with each sub according to what I find their deepest desires are and what my mood is. Some like to be given a list of tasks to complete. Some like to be enticed with porn clips and naughty messages. Most all like pics I send them when they earn them. I like to teach them how to give themselves the strongest orgasms they can have via my prompting which makes for a more intense fulfilling relationship. I believe above all you have to be good trusting friends with fantastic sexual chemistry between you for things to work out long distance for a long time. I treasure my guys and have had them for quite some time now. I suppose I would be considered a unusual Mistress as I think of my subs as pets not slaves and get off on their pleasure as they do mine.
Bunny12


Bunny Rabbits cute and fuzzy they want to love you but they have razor sharp teeth - don't piss them off!
Lurker
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My sub is able to have good fun when we are apart. We talk, she is told to orgasm only when I say so, then I have her do things she doesn't normally do. One idea is walking around her apartment naked, fantasizing about a woman at the pool, thinking about taking me into her mouth while I spank her ... etc. We do this by phone or text. Yes I do let her cum.
Lurker
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Got to agree with Bunny12 here. Consistency and reliability are the keys so neither is just freaking out and wondering "what next?" or "when next?" Not that there aren't surprises, but that the trust and dependability are established AND maintained. In addition, I think it's important in any relationship that the "seduction" continues daily and neither takes anything for granted. The more empathic you are, sensitive to each others' feelings, thoughts, desires, wants, needs, the better the relationship. You must communicate and the deeper, wider, more inclusive that communication is, the stronger the bond. You have to get way beyond the texting "Whut u doin? U hrny?" scale. smile
Rocker of the cocker
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Quote by Bunny12
First of all staying in contact via email, chat, text, cam and phone is most important of all to keep that special bond between you which creates trust. Then it is different with each sub according to what I find their deepest desires are and what my mood is. Some like to be given a list of tasks to complete. Some like to be enticed with porn clips and naughty messages. Most all like pics I send them when they earn them. I like to teach them how to give themselves the strongest orgasms they can have via my prompting which makes for a more intense fulfilling relationship. I believe above all you have to be good trusting friends with fantastic sexual chemistry between you for things to work out long distance for a long time. I treasure my guys and have had them for quite some time now. I suppose I would be considered a unusual Mistress as I think of my subs as pets not slaves and get off on their pleasure as they do mine.


I agree with Bunny12 and WmCutterBlack, very good points .. and I like that part for sure smile
Lurker
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Skype...and some hot texts
Cock Connoisseur
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Quote by WmCutterBlack
Got to agree with Bunny12 here. Consistency and reliability are the keys so neither is just freaking out and wondering "what next?" or "when next?" Not that there aren't surprises, but that the trust and dependability are established AND maintained. In addition, I think it's important in any relationship that the "seduction" continues daily and neither takes anything for granted. The more empathic you are, sensitive to each others' feelings, thoughts, desires, wants, needs, the better the relationship. You must communicate and the deeper, wider, more inclusive that communication is, the stronger the bond. You have to get way beyond the texting "Whut u doin? U hrny?" scale. smile


Very well said...the "AND maintained" is so important as is all that you outlined there.
Lurker
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I wish I could say that it works for me, but I have been in two so far, one was in real, and the other was just online, I am at fault for one of them not working out, and the other one was her fault, but when its good its can be great, I concur with the comment about having your submissive doing assignments, it is exciting knowing they are doing the assignment and getting reports from them as they are doing it and when its completed. For those of you that it is working out, enjoy it. For myself, I am not against getting into another long distance bdsm relationship again, but that being said, I am also not looking for one...
Active Ink Slinger
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been there done that and i'm not sure i'll ever trust that much again.
No one can make you jealous, angry, vengeful, or greedy -unless you let him.
- Napoleon Hill
Active Ink Slinger
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Yes it can work depending on the relationship between the Master or Mistress and sub
Active Ink Slinger
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I should further clarify that as what are they looking for in their Relationship is it just physchological or do they want it to be physical also
Lurker
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I would like to chime in. When I am away from my Mistress we do keep in contact via the phone or email.
Webcamming also really helps keep the bond between a sub and his mistress strong.
Lurker
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In addition to all that's been said before, I think it's terribly important in any relationship, be it online or off, that the submissive be continually reassured that they are desired and not discarded. It's not a matter of "when it's convenient" or "only when I feel horny". It's a relationship, not a "hookup" or fuck buddy situation. I also think it's incumbent on a Dominant to help the submissive over rough emotional spots, when they are feeling depressed for whatever reason. It's a big responsibility having a genuine relationship and not just a one-off or strictly cyber sex situation. It doesn't have to be teddy bears, unicorns, whips and chains, or sharing porn. It can be so much more and should be unless you're just having fun together.
Lurker
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Well even though a lot of times it kills me to know i can't have his touch...or ACTUALLY be with him....even the simplest pm or txt makes my day!.....emails are always a nice surprise...and i love skyping with my Master!!!smile