Join the best erotica focused adult social network now
Login

It's Over

last reply
14 replies
1.9k views
0 watchers
0 likes
Active Ink Slinger
0 likes
have asked you people what to do "Whether to tell or no in the post (http://www.lushstories.com/forum/yaf_postst21231_To-Say-or-not-to-say.aspx)". And the result is out...

Before i could tell her how i feel about her she told me that she likes someone else. sad

And now she is asking now what to do about it coz he is far away from her.

Thanks for all your help guys smile but i think i was not worth it i really love her a lot but its over even before it started ...
Alpha Blonde
0 likes
Aww... sorry to hear it didn't work out hornyboy.

The Friend Zone is infamous and very hard to work your way out of in general. Try not to feel too bad about it... most guys have experiences like this and it just helps them to see the signs and subtleties with the next female friends they start to crush on.

As much as it hurts, at least the 'awkward conversation' didn't happen, and you can technically still be friends. Although you are now going to become her sounding board and advice-guy when it comes to talking about her new love interest. If you still want to stay friends, I'd try to steer the conversation away from that topic in general going forward. If not, there's no harm in just moving on in general.
Active Ink Slinger
0 likes
If you still want her, your best shot is probably by not pursuing her anyway. If you want to make sure nothing ever grows out of it, tell her, so you can move on. Otherwise, just go after someone else, you never know. Option A: the next target will be even better than this girl. Option B: with some time and the continued friendship, current girl sees how great a person you are and grows deeper feelings for you. Option C: everybody moves on independently and this isn't even an afterthought in the future. Option D: you dwell on this and regret a past you can't change and a future you can't have.

Keep your head up and look ahead.
Lurker
0 likes
Aaaw, sorry it never worked out for you!!

Don't be downhearted...
Internet Philosopher
0 likes
Sorry to hear that. I know how much it hurts.
This is where advice fails but if it were me I'd stay close and be the sounding board. This other guy is far away as you have said and relationships like that almost never works. You are likely in for a long painful wait but if you can you may still be able to win her just by being the guy who showed he cared.
Whatever you do I wish you well.
Active Ink Slinger
0 likes
OMG!

Please resist the urge to be the 'supportive' friend character unless you enjoy having your heart ripped apart every time she comes running to you for support when the other guy is unavailable. If you truly love her then you will always feel the hurt.

Age old saying goes something like - "If you truly love something then let it go. If it loves you it will come back."

Tell her how you feel regardless and that it hurts too much to stay around although you'll always consider her a friend - then just walk away. Find someone new - move on. If the Gods favour your honesty then she will see the strength of your love and come back.
"Whoa, lady, I only speak two languages, English and bad English." - Korben Dallas, from The Fifth Element

"If history repeats itself, and the unexpected always happens, how incapable must man be of learning from experience?" - George Bernard Shaw
Active Ink Slinger
0 likes
Quote by mercianknight

Please resist the urge to be the 'supportive' friend character unless you enjoy having your heart ripped apart every time she comes running to you for support when the other guy is unavailable. If you truly love her then you will always feel the hurt.


That is sooo true. Made that mistake before.
Welcome to visit my tumblr page at http://HK4167.tumblr.com for erotic arts. Or http://slice-of-moment.tumblr.com for non-erotic arts.
Alpha Blonde
0 likes
I would not say anything... i would just move on.

Reason for this being, we generally already know when our guy-friends are crushing on us. You guys make it pretty obvious even when you think you're not. When this happens and we feel like you're getting "too into us" we will attempt to chill things down by talking about other guys and trying to avoid the awkward moment of 'friendship-interruptus'. By talking about other guys, reinforcing what a great 'friend' you've been for listening, and showing you that our interests lay elsewhere, we're trying to let you know in a subtle way that it's not going to happen.

This is a very common friend-zone deflection strategy used by women all the time.

We like our guy friends... so just be our friend. smile

If you want to date us or fuck us, then make those intentions known up front within a couple of weeks of knowing us. It saves the confusion later.
Active Ink Slinger
0 likes
Quote by Dancing_Doll
I would not say anything... i would just move on.

Reason for this being, we generally already know when our guy-friends are crushing on us. You guys make it pretty obvious even when you think you're not. When this happens and we feel like you're getting "too into us" we will attempt to chill things down by talking about other guys and trying to avoid the awkward moment of 'friendship-interruptus'. By talking about other guys, reinforcing what a great 'friend' you've been for listening, and showing you that our interests lay elsewhere, we're trying to let you know in a subtle way that it's not going to happen.

This is a very common friend-zone deflection strategy used by women all the time.

We like our guy friends... so just be our friend. smile

If you want to date us or fuck us, then make those intentions known up front within a couple of weeks of knowing us. It saves the confusion later.


I wish I had heard about this ten years ago.
Welcome to visit my tumblr page at http://HK4167.tumblr.com for erotic arts. Or http://slice-of-moment.tumblr.com for non-erotic arts.
Active Ink Slinger
0 likes
Sorry to hear this. But it is probably for the best. I would just move on. you can still be her friend but do not get involved with talking about the guy or telling her what to do since that is a no win situatuin for you.

One question though. You said the guy is "far away", is it possible that there is no guy but she realized your intentions and is just saying this to either stop you from pursuing her or maybe to avoid rejecting you and hurting your feelings? Just a thought.
Clumeleon
0 likes
Schade.

Hope you can maintain your friendship and that you can move past this in a healthy way. The 'Friend Zone' (check out the thread in Olivia's Corner) ain't all bad when it comes down to it as long as you aren't constantly trying to claw your way out of it.

Tread carefully for a while. Best of luck in love, HB.
Active Ink Slinger
0 likes
Quote by Dancing_Doll
I would not say anything... i would just move on.

Reason for this being, we generally already know when our guy-friends are crushing on us. You guys make it pretty obvious even when you think you're not. When this happens and we feel like you're getting "too into us" we will attempt to chill things down by talking about other guys and trying to avoid the awkward moment of 'friendship-interruptus'. By talking about other guys, reinforcing what a great 'friend' you've been for listening, and showing you that our interests lay elsewhere, we're trying to let you know in a subtle way that it's not going to happen.

This is a very common friend-zone deflection strategy used by women all the time.

We like our guy friends... so just be our friend. smile

If you want to date us or fuck us, then make those intentions known up front within a couple of weeks of knowing us. It saves the confusion later.


you were right .. When i told her about my feelings she said how can u like me ? I must have sent some wrong message to you .. she was so happy when i called but then she said she wants to know it.. but when i told her she said that and she was kinda depressed.. i hate myself for making her feel bad..
Lurker
0 likes
GLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE heart!