Hello,
I want to spice up my sex life !
Please can you advise on 'Spanklings' I want to receive a spanking from my OH - What do I wear ? Do I keep my knickers on first ? Does he finger me and get's my 'pussy wet' ? Does he use an implement ? If so which ones ? - all advice welcome - Abigail.
I spank my gf from time to time, but not hard and it's more spontaneous. Usually when we're doing it doggie-style, or she's in reverse cow-girl position. When we both are very excited I will spank her lightly first to see her reaction, then more strength if it's OK with her. Only palm, no board.
I'd say for us it's a very spontaneous move and we don't have any pre-set. I remember the first time I spanked her, after the sex I asked her feeling about it when we cuddle together. Only when she said OK then we decide to include it in our sex life. So I'd say communication is important to make sure you both are comfortable with the idea.
I wish my daddy would spank me like u....I need discipline...
Daddy. I'll put this in the book i am writing....Let's chat..always want more ideas
a good spanking can be just the thing that takes you over the edge provided you're with a partner who knows what they're doing...too hard and it could come across as violent (unless you're into that sort of thing) but just the right pressure and placement can make the difference between good sex and great sex.
Agree with Belle.......my BF spanks me..makes me cum more
Abigail...
Not sure who you are wanting a spanking from ... your post says "from my OH".
I believe you are wanting an over the knee (OTK) type of spanking. (or maybe more...) but depending on your partner ... that is a good place to start. If you can talk about it with your partner and discuss what he/she wants that is a good idea.
Most OTK spankings are done with the hand only. Not to say a paddle or ruler or other type of device can not be used.
Dressed in blouse, bra, skirt, panties, stockings and heels is a very erotic way to start a spanking. Your partner (if sensual and experienced) would most likely begin spankings through your clothing with rubbing in between ...
He/she would most likely lift your skirt up and pull your panties down to your mid-thighs for spanking your ass directly ...
The sky is the limit here ... it all depends on your partner....
Hope this helps.
Recently, my DH and i started incorporating spankings more into our sex life. At first it was occasional - like during doggie - but we've turned it up a notch. This isn't always how it happens, but this is one of my faves: He'll call on his way home from work and tell me what to wear (or not to wear), and where i should be (ie, over the armrest of the couch). He will get home, taking His time to get settled, while i lay there, anticipating. He'll go choose his device (whip, paddle, etc). At first He'll start out very lightly, rubbing me afterward. He rotates the area He spanks so that one part of me doesn't get too much. He increases the intensity slowly, while kissing me and/or talking dirty to me. Sometimes He'll bind my hands or gag me. Sometimes i'll pretend like i'm struggling against it, other times i simply enjoy.
**It's very important to have a safe word when you decide to incorporate this type of light SM. i have two safe words: One means, "i need to tell you something for real, but i don't want to necessarily stop" and the other one means, "STOP, NOW." This needs to be worked out beforehand.
i would also warn that this, especially if there is binding involved, is best done with someone you really know well and trust. Realize that you WILL be in a position of submission but it should always be pleasurable for BOTH of you.
One more thing: it is *His JOB* to create an atmosphere of trust where i can yield to the pain/pleasure. It is *my JOB* to let him know when i've reached my boundary - when good pain becomes bad pain, as they say. The threshold is different for me day-to-day. My DH *ALWAYS* respects the safe word, and thanks me afterward for using it. This feedback helps Him to create a better (hotter) atmosphere, that we both enjoy.
Anyway, it's been a REALLY fun and interesting thing to add to our sex life! If you are at all sub in anyway, I highly recommend it. Good luck! :-)
For me the ritual is important. It has to begin with a lecture, or scolding. It should include some corner time, but not too much, preferably corner time as a break during the spanking. It should be over the knee, and I should get a few swats on the skirt or jeans first. If I'm wearing jeans I like to be taken across the knee for a few smacks and then be told to get up and take them down, but I like to have my skirt lifted, and if we're role playing I'm usually wearing a skirt. I like to have my panties taken down while over the knee too. Like girlyju said, it's important to have a partner you can trust, even in light BDSM. In anything heavier than an OTK spanking with the palm trust is absolutely the most important factor. You don't want some guy with a belt or cane who ignores the safeword, and you certainly don't want to be tied up or chained by someone whom you can't trust to stop when you want them to. I find it's easier to get a guy to go deeper into bondage and domination if we start out with spanking. If he's not into that he probably won't be into further exploration. While one of the great things is pushing the boundaries, it's important to have a partner who stays within the boundaries you set.
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OTK spanking is best done over clothes to start with... Allows for the dominant person to play with the panties covered ass and then teasing sensation for the spankee to know that the panties are going be pulled off but when!
Depending on the relationship... Spanking can be delivered by an open palm or a nice paddle...
