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Posted: Sunday, October 17, 2010 2:42:35 AM

Rank: Advanced Wordsmith

Joined: 11/28/2008
Posts: 2,588
Location: Newcastle, United Kingdom
I was talking about this with some friends the other night. I like both men and women, but have never needed to label myself as being bi - I;m attracted to who I am attracted to regardless of gender.

However I know a lot of people who find it very important to say "Hey I'm bi" "Hey I'm straight" or "Hey I am gay" and will always make it very clear.

I guess this is more of a question for bi people, but how important do you feel it is to label your sexuality?
Posted: Sunday, October 17, 2010 4:47:08 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 927,123
I have a friend - well i say friend, i dont actually like her, more of an acquaintance - who flips weekly from just straight, to just gay, to just bi, coming up with a different partner depending on what she is that week. She hasnt got it into her skull yet that nobody cares! She just does it for attention and to be different.

Im not bi (maybe a bit curious) but i dont think its important at all to label yourself. You're attracted to who you're attracted to whether that more men than women or vice versa. If you see yourself as straight and fancy a women, theres no need to start to start panicking 'maybe i should tell everyone i'm bi cos i think i am'. Theres too many rules about this kind of thing.

Saying that, today many people are still homophobic ie. parents of a different generation, so i would make sure they knew vaguely of my bi-sexuality before i started bringing women home.
Posted: Monday, October 18, 2010 12:05:04 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 927,123
I really do not use the term BiSexual for myself.

If I were to meet an attactive woman at a party or in a club, certainly could be as much of a Lesbian as the next woman. Sometimes I think I could be perfectly happy as a Lesbian!

But if things were reversed and I met a attractive man am as straight as could be.

Then there is my husband who seems to be excited for me to walk both sides of the Path of Love.

Please Don't Call Me BiSexual
Posted: Monday, October 18, 2010 4:33:10 PM

Rank: Artistic Tart

Joined: 9/25/2009
Posts: 4,769
I agree with you, Rx. Labels are for those that need them, not for me. I like what I like, when I like it. It's not always consistent- in fact it rarely is. That's true of me in general, not just who I'm sexually attracted to.
Posted: Monday, October 18, 2010 4:51:29 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 927,123
yep..i too believe you like who you like and thats it. doesnt matter if there is a huge age difference or and ocean between you. whether they are fat or thin blonde or red..man or woman..
Posted: Monday, October 18, 2010 6:15:34 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 927,123
Almost all of my experience has been with men, but I have dared to step over the line, and found it rather pleasing. I'm truly more attracted to a person than a gender, so I find it hard to label myself anything. But I suppose I would consider myself bisexual (just because I find myself being attracted to both). I've never really needed to explain my sexual orientation to my close friends or family, they have just always assumed I was straight, and that's fine with my because I guess "most of the time"?? I am?

Now I just confused myself, but as for the question do I need a label? No I certainly don't need one, I'm still figuring that out for myself.

If I one day arrive at the conclusion "Yup, I'm most definitely bisexual" I still probably won't feel the need to label myself that way, as long as I know who I am, and my partner knows, that's all that matters to me.
Posted: Friday, October 22, 2010 7:59:38 PM

Rank: Alpha Blonde

Joined: 2/17/2010
Posts: 7,559
Location: Your dirty fantasy
I have no idea how to label myself, and therefore usually don't use labels.

I lean more to straight, but I will play with a girl on a sexual level sometimes if there is an attraction there.

I wouldn't end up in relationship with a girl, and I couldn't see myself falling in love a girl (at least I haven't had that inclination so far), so I tend to hesitate with labels.

I mean, is bisexuality about being interested in both genders on a sexual level, or being interested in both genders emotionally/sexually? I see a fundamental difference depending on how it's interpreted.

Maybe I'd classify myself as "bisexual-lite?"

Either way... who needs labels? People should just do what feels right.

Posted: Friday, October 22, 2010 10:19:57 PM

Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 10/10/2010
Posts: 23
Location: mid west
Why classify? You are who you are, you like who and what you like and lables do not do anything but put you into a category.

I am me. I like men, I like woman.

I like women because they are soft, to touch their body is fun, to be able to do the things to them I like done to me and see the reactions is wonderful, I think woman (all shapes, colors and sizes) are beautiful.

I like men because they are hard (in more than one sense of the word). They react to everything different than women, they can fulfill desires women cant (not even with toys), men are unique and most of the time need more reassuring about themselves than a woman which gives me lots of pleasure ( i love boosting egos).

Basically, I love the human form. Everyone is different, everyone has so much to offer and everyone can teach you something.

I just consider myself diverse.

An open mind is the greatest thing on earth, it allows creativity, acceptance, and new ideas. It can encourage those locked in their own minds to break free and experience everything life has to offer. Open your mind to anything and everything, you never know what pleasures you may be missing!
Posted: Monday, October 25, 2010 5:54:26 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 927,123
Why do I see a lot of "friend requests" for each of you after this thread?
Posted: Thursday, October 28, 2010 10:49:00 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 927,123
well, im not intolabels either, i like good people whether male or female. if we become sexually attracted to each other , so be it. just let it happen. personally , i enjoy watching two women making love, so erotic . and some men are the same way.
Posted: Thursday, October 28, 2010 3:48:00 PM

Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 8/7/2009
Posts: 14,751
Location: The Other Side Of The Mirror
In my profile, I stated that I am Bisexual! That is because my main reason for being on Lush was to talk to other women who also like women. More to learn new things and why they feel the way they do. To continue my never ending (hopefully) sexual journey. Anything else that happened is a bonus. But I also like sex with men too, very much. So I figured I should call myself something.

But in my personal life, I never label myself as straight or bi. I am just a very sexual woman who happens to like men and women. I admit I lean more towards women these days but I will never be exclusive to one sex.

Why would anyone really care what we label ourselves anyhow? Like someone for who they are, not what they are or what they call themselves.
Posted: Wednesday, December 22, 2010 9:16:45 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 927,123
Seriously, I don't think it should matter. Our society is so hung up on labeling you, putting you into this nice neat category so that their world is orderly, and if you don't go into any particular category they go nuts! You love who you love. Period. I myself love guys but I have found myself looking at girls also and I don't feel any pressure to call myself bi or whatever. Now do women get me hot like men do? Not necessarily, but that could always change.
Posted: Wednesday, December 22, 2010 9:23:37 AM

Rank: Removalist

Joined: 11/17/2010
Posts: 979
Location: Mountains of , United States

What is your sexual preference?
a. Straight
b. Gay
c. Bi
d. Yes, sex please!
Posted: Wednesday, December 22, 2010 10:35:15 AM

Rank: Her Royal Spriteness

Joined: 6/18/2010
Posts: 25,032
Location: Over Jen's lap
Good question! I'll do my best to answer for myself. I consider myself bi-sexual. I enjoy sexual relations with both men and women. Now, having said that, i don't run around and announce it every where i go - i don't feel the need to be 'out and proud', really, it's a private thing in some ways. Now, that said, i'm also not embarrassed, and if it come up in conversation, yes, i will readily admit to it.

That, said... Lush is a different animal. it's driven by sex, and there's almost a need to carry a label here, especially for the girls. We're going to get hit on, it's the nature of the beast, and isn't it better to let people know first, if they should move on or not by labeling ourselves? It certainly saves a lot of those 'sorry, i'm not attracted to X gender' moments. not ALL of them, but some of them, at least.

as for me, i fall for personalities, for people. it's not about the gender, but about the person. i've been in love with both men and women, although i have to admit, i tend to be more comfortable in relationships with females these days. that might change, that might not, but i am always open to where ever my heart leads me.

Posted: Thursday, December 23, 2010 3:28:18 PM

Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 12/23/2010
Posts: 13
Labels are for trendies. If you want to be "cool" or "modern" or "trendy" then you label yourself. The real people don't need to mention this, it don't matter.
Posted: Wednesday, December 29, 2010 10:31:59 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 927,123
I am in some agreement with Sprite on this one. I do class myself as bi-sexual because I also enjoy sexual relations with men and women. I also don't run around announcing it to everyone in the real world because it has already caused a few issues with friends and would do with family if I told them. Here on Lush I feel that I'm in a protected environment so I can be much more open about it. Labelling myself isn't a problem to me and whether that's right, wrong, trendy, cool, modern, attention seeking or otherwise to other members of Lush is of no importance to me. I'm not comfortable in long-term relationships with men or women at this point in my life but I'm only 23 years old and have a few years left on the clock before settling down with a man or a woman and eventually (as Sprite says) I will be open to where ever my heart leads me.

Thanks Sprite for helping me with an important question to answer for MYSELF by reading your response.
Posted: Thursday, December 30, 2010 12:14:59 PM

Rank: Rookie Scribe

Joined: 12/27/2010
Posts: 4
Location: Lexington, United States
I think that some people do not want to label their sexually because it would become a part of their self image and how others react to them. Others may find it exciting to get near the edge of the cliff, but not jump off. Once you completely jump off, the fantasy may not be as exciting as the day to day reality. A thinking mind likes to stretch the boundaries to keep it exciting.
Posted: Tuesday, January 4, 2011 3:55:51 PM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 927,123
I consider myself, at 60, to be bisexual. I enjoy both men and women equally. At my age, sex is sex and if the other person and I hit it off - their sex does not matter - just the result - awesome sex!
Posted: Monday, January 17, 2011 5:27:05 AM

Rank: Lurker

Joined: 12/1/2006
Posts: 927,123
I like some guys and I like some girls.
I don't really like to be called Bisexual.. but what can you do?
Posted: Sunday, January 23, 2011 9:41:54 AM

Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 1/22/2011
Posts: 20
Location: Canada
I think its odd that so many people like to label sexual preference/orientation. If someone steals a bag of chips in a moment of drunken foolishness we dont label that person a thief for life yet if a college girl licks a lil plussy shes a bonafide dyke for life. I consider myself a straight guy yet Ive blown more loads to my own stroking than to all partners combined so maybe that makes me asexual or at least deserving of some humiliating jokes cuz lord knows im the only one whos ever given himeself a hand job! Also Ive run accross numerous straight guys who are more than happy to exchange blow jobs when they are between girlfriends. I can pretty much gaurantee that none of these people are going to advertise their bi behaviour with a label and most of em probably consider themselves to be straight.

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